The Trick of It All

Clay and I were walking in the backyard, and we spotted this beauty. I wish mushrooms had a more whimsical name because some of them are really quite magical. But if you say, “Come look at this mushroom!” no one expects to see something gorgeous. Maybe that the trick of it all. I wonder if the namer thought the surprise of the sight was worth the sound of the title.

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Flower Swords and Butterflies

This plant has doubled in size since this time last summer!

I call it a butterfly plant because the butterflies really like to hang around it. The kids love the color and the way the tiny blooms cluster together to make flower swords. Husband calls the bush by its Christian name, which I can’t dredge up from my mental well at the moment. Either way, it’s beautiful and looking at it makes me happy, so I’m sharing it with you lovely folks!

Happy Wednesday!
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Giving It Away: Poetry and Art

I recently bought some watercolor pencils and have been having a grand time playing with them.

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My mom gave me a bit of money for Mother’s Day, which funded the purchase. So, I gave my first piece to my patron and, can I just say, I’m pleased as punch at how it came out. 😍

I wrote the poem a week or so before as an observation after seeing a ladybug flying away, but it really embodies my mom, too. She’s been through a ton, and I’m watching her hover now, her pointed toes inches above the earth.

Definitely expect to see more watercolors in the future. I’m kinda in love with them.

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Motivation Part II: Types of It

Hello, Folks! In PART I of the Motivation series, we defined motivation and identified that fear is a natural response to change, and writing a book involves lots of change. Today, I’d like to talk to you about three types of motivation that I’ve discovered on this journey. Please note that I’ve named these myself after dissecting my own need-to-write v. production situation. Search yourself to see if what I’ve found out about me relates to you. If you want to chat through it, I’m always up for a discussion.

Alright! Let’s get to the good stuff!

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First, Temporary Motivation

Not only did I make up the name, but I’ve also crafted a definition. See!

Temporary Motivation is motivation with an external stimulus.

(Definition of “motivation” can be found HERE.)

This was the first type of motivation that got my fingers moving again at the beginning of 2017. Here’s a piece of my story. After a long stint of postpartum depression and 11 years of a rough work situation, I felt like a shell of a person. I’d started a new job and the difference in work environments started helping me heal. It was about six months after I moved positions that I realized I was only moving moment-to-moment. I cared for my family, went to work, cooked, cleaned and went to bed. That was basically it. But with healing came perspective. I started to see past the next minute into the next day and the next year, and I started to want something particular in the vision.

I wanted my boys to have a career they loved. I didn’t want them to ever settle in any part of life, particularly professionally. So, my first temporary motivation was the future of my two toddler boys. How could I tell them to do something they love if I wasn’t doing what I loved, even if it was in 10 minutes increments? I started waking up, making plans, and stringing words.

Temporary motivation is a jumping off point. It’s not where you want to stay because you can’t control it.

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One day, my boys will be grown and have their own dream careers and that will be it for me if I stopped here. No more motivation for Mea. They will have achieved.

For me to get started, I had to have something outside of my worn heart to move me into action, so my insides could heal even more. So, yeah, that’s a little about me.

Here’s some other examples of temporary motivation:

  • Creative Friends: I adore adore adore my creative friends and they definitely keep me on my toes, but it can’t be just this comradery that fuels you. While you’re sharing weekly updates, keep searching inside yourself for Something More.
  • Accomplishments: Funny thing about accomplishments is that you have to work through the fear to have one. Also, temporary as they are in nature, accomplishments must be replenished with more accomplishments, which means this motivation has an expiration date. While you’re feeling like you’re on top of the world, keep working!
  • Reputation: Reputations come and go. Just ask our friend TAYLOR. They’re fragile and temporary. Real Talk-Not everybody is going to like us. It will crush our souls for a while and then we’ll remember who we are and get back up. But you have to know the truth to use it like a pull bar.

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Next, Permanent Motivation-The Key to Longevity

Definition!

Permanent Motivation: motivation without external stimulus.

This, my Friends, is what we’re constantly in search of. When all the glitter (or shrapnel) settles and the fireworks (or bomb glares) fade, this motivation is what will calmly and earnestly push us forward. Permanent motivation is internal and depends solely on you knowing yourself. I connect the idea to “self-motivation”. It’s a pure, true, and long-lasting foundation to the driving force of our creative heart’s desire.

You can start with temporary motivated blaze, but along the way you have to grow to know yourself because when the blaze dies out, all you’ll have is you.

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It’s so easy to drown out the whisper of permanent motivation. Everything else—doubt, fear, criticism, jealousy—is so darn loud. Also, you can warp a permanent motivation to something anti-productive so easily, you have to keep yourself in check. How do I know? Well, sadly, I’ve been there. Over and over again. It’s embarrassing how many times, really. But I promised you truth in this BLOG, so here it is.

Examples of permanent motivation and how it can be warped:

  • Curiosity (Can be over-used and can turn into procrastinating with all the knowledge gathering of things not pertinent to your Right Now or your project.)
  • A soul cry (Can be drowned out by everyday responsibilities if we don’t set a precedent to heed it, holding it to our ear like a conch shell)
  • Goals linked to our passions (Dreams paired with action. Without the action, it’s just a dream.)

 

And finally, DIY Motivation.

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DIY (Do It Yourself) Motivation is motivation that you have to cultivate because you just. Ain’t. Feelin’ it.

So what if you don’t have either of the first two types of motivation. What if you are numb, but you remember the good ol’ days when you were young and spry and well-rested. When you had the gumption to finish Things and, by goodness, you DID finish things, but it’s been so long ago. Those days fade and shift, like looking at your reflection in a lake on a breezy day. What if you never were the kind of person to finish things at all?

What if you reading this and you’re saying, “Yeah, sure, Mea. That’s all well and good for you, but I heave doubt and fear on my shoulders like it’s my passed-on grandmother’s shawl. It’s so heavy and I cannot move.”

I have ideas for you (because I’ve been there. I still involuntarily go there because sometimes that’s just where my stinkin’ feet take me.)

Here’s some ways that can help you can create your own motivation until you start figuring some things out.

  • Finish Something: Pick a project—any project—and discover what it feels like to Finish Something.

I did this with my poetry chapbook, and it distracted my fear long enough to allow something else in. I chose it because it was the shortest and scariest project I had on my desk. But mostly because it was the shortest. The shock and joy that comes when a project is finished, it’s like cake, Folks. Super addictive. If you’re like me, you’ll race right passed fear/doubt toward your next culinary fix.

  • Stop Something: The project that gives you irreconcilable grief. Let. It. Go.

My first novel was…um…not great. I knew it and I kept trucking on because I had given so much time to it that my fingers stubbornly grasped it. Surely I would reap some reward, right? The reward didn’t come in the form I’d envisioned. I had to stop trying to force a story that wasn’t ready through the tips of my fingers. Then in retrospect, I saw the many writing lessons and self-learning I’d not noticed when I was buried in the broken story. That was its purpose, but I didn’t know it until I put it down and walked away. As a result, the heaviness and self-doubt lifted and I could suddenly move toward new things.

  • Make Something Else: If you’re feeling weighed down by one creative endeavor, try something out of the ordinary.

I’m a firm believer in the power of creative outlet sharing. Meaning, creating something else can spark ideas in other aspects of your life. I feel like there could be some science about it somewhere, but I haven’t searched for/found it yet. So, take my unscientific advice if you want an adventure and do something different! I love making jewelry, songs, memes (yes, this is creative, gah), poetry, and t-shirts designs I don’t know how to put on t-shirts—especially, when my novel is at a stand-still.

And that’s it!

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Three types of motivation as acknowledged by a writer, and the conclusion of our Motivation series. I’d love to hear if you’ve had similar experiences or have other ideas about motivation. Have you found ways to get your fingers tapping or to calm internal choppy waters? Let’s talk!

Sig

No Small Thing

 

No Small Thing

“Does it seem too small a thing to you that the God of Israel has separated you from the community of Israel to bring you near to himself, to perform the service of the tabernacle of the Lord, and to stand before the community to minister to them?”

Numbers 16:9 NET

IT’S NO SMALL THING AT ALL.

Let’s act like it.

Rejection, Take 2

OMG, IT HUUUUUUUURRRRRRRTTTTTTSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM ME????

Oh, that’s right….

NOTHING!!!

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Can I tell you a secret? I had this dream about getting an acceptance email, and I held onto it tightly, quietly. I pretended I didn’t expect rejections, but I didn’t expect all the rejections. It was the first time I put myself out there…

I’m fine. I’ll be fine. It’s just my ego. It hurts. In my experience, though, good things come shrinking the ol’  ego. So, I’ll be restructuring the poetry book and getting it ready to go out again after I finish the draft of All the Words.

Whine break is over. Time to get back to the work.

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Observe with Your Whole Self: A Writing Lesson for Life

Writing has taught me a lot, but the coolest thing I’ve learned since I’ve started writing (book, poetry, and the Proof blog) is the awe-inspiring power of observation. I’ve been writing even before I began actively observing others and the world around me, and I can attest that your work becomes worth reading if it portrays real life rather than if it what you think real life is.

I don’t mean that memoirs are the only awesome literature. Or that you should Hemingway your WIP.

There can still be contented endings, beautiful people, and even happy coincidences. Those things do happen in real life (though they are few and far between, and for the love of Rufus, don’t be annoying with them, please.)

This is what I mean:

There is no way I can create a character that isn’t like me if I don’t open my eyes and my heart and soak in other people. Invest in them. SEE them for all they are—a perfect swirl of chaos and beauty.  Experience them, empathize with them, take their humanity and roll it around in my head for a while until I UNDERSTAND something integral, and why it’s there.

(This also applies to setting, in my opinion.)

I’ve had to do this first with me…and I didn’t always like the images I saw. (I still look inside for understanding because I just haven’t gotten to the bottom of my crazy.)

I don’t know if it’s this stage in my life or if I have writing to thank for this deep soul-diving. Probably a combination of both? But I’m so thankful because more than writing better, observing and internalizing has become imperative to living better.

It embeds in me the worth of who or what has my attention. And that breeds respect.

I imagine the soul is like a spider producing web; I press my hand into the other person’s, and they share with me a silver thread. I tie the end to my own strand…and, there. We are connected.

(Places are kinda like that, too.)

When Crabs and Spiders Collide

[This tiny, crab-like spider is way less scary than the other picture I took, so…You’re welcome.]

This path—writing, observing, connecting—has made me grow up…and out. I digress sometimes, but ultimately I remember the joy and find my way again.

Truth Bomb: It can hurt sometimes, what you see. Don’t let it stop you.

Are you writing real life from a point of understanding? If you’re not, shouldn’t you be? (This is rhetorical, unless you don’t want it to be.)

Have you discovered your observational superpower? Has it changed your life, too?

Sig